It was supposed a nice little ladies night out. More specifically a night off for mommies of preschoolers. How much more sweet can it get? Pulling up to the 80’s neon SKATE sign brought back floods of elementary school memories. Backwards skate, limbo, hokey pokey, roller blades and bouncing off the wall when you can’t stop. The parking lot brought back high school anxieties. All sorts of clicks hovering around one or two cars. A bit shady? Nah more like tailgating. And that’s when the light went off. PRE PARTY you moron. Or perhaps they sell booze inside and I never realized it as an 8 year old. I mean of course they do, right? Look at all these people. Literally skaters, posers, hood rats, work-out fanatics and shit mommies of preschoolers. These fools definitely need a cocktail with their wheels. So I thank the good Lord I carpooled with my sweet sweet friend Becky, tell those inner voices that are shouting out my insecurities to peace out and savor those last few minutes in the comfort of shoes.
Few bucks, one coupon and a skate rental later and I’m in. Same benches, same rink, same snack bar. And holy shit, I see machines swirling slushy goodness. WTF? Icees? No booze? Why are all these people here then? Think of exit strategy NOW.
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