Any other broad that slapped my ass like that, I’d have called a bitch. But something about her sweetly shaved head and flannel shirt with unmatched bauble bead necklace had me think twice. She was a walking contradiction. Actually a rolling contradiction. A non-bitch on wheels. And she literally just slapped my ass. Shocked and mildly embarrassed and if I’m honest, perhaps a bit flattered, I turned to check out my offender. This chick seriously had more eyelashes than hair on her head. Almost beautiful? So she likes my “juicy butt”. Hmm. A first. Pulling myself together and attempting to think like a Kennedy I politely let this non-bitch know I’m married and that I’d rather not have my ass slapped. “Ha!” she says and lets me know she “don’t give a fuck”. Apparently it just looked nice and anyways she’s engaged. She just wanted to slap it is all. “Oh, ok.” Welcome to Wednesdays at the Rollercade.
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